Wednesday, November 30, 2011


The Lady's Guide to Being a Lady

Less is more. Ladies should embrace this as a rule, not a suggestion. This rule is, in no way, shape or form , regarding the amount of clothing you have on, ladies are never to be described as skimpy.

How A Lady Remains Simple and Classy

First topic at hand is a lady's face. An everyday face should remain minimalistic. Find yourself a good matte powder, clump-free mascara and subtle rouge. These three essentials make for a day look that is all you, just barely enhanced. To spice up a day look, add a little eye liner or splash on some lip color. Night time looks can be more outgoing. But keep in mind that lady should never look like a recent clown college graduate. Keep one area of the face the focus. Fill in a bold brow or paint on electric blue liquid liner or dab on plum lipstick. Never all at once. 

     Second topic is accessories. As Coco Chanel once advised, Always take one accessory off before you walk out the door. Now every lady should take anything Coco has ever said as scripture. A lady should not be overly cluttered. Apply the less is more rule here. And as with makeup, pick one accent piece. My current accent piece is a bold cocktail ring. As my own personal rule, I usually wear a necklace OR earrings, rarely both. 
Or a chunky bangle like Ms. Chanel

Third topic is over all appearance, namely dress. A lady can never own too much black. Black is classy. Black will never go out of style. Black is flattering. Black can be paired with nearly anything.  Black is a lady's best friend. Black is simple. There are five wardrobe staples every lady should own in black: a black pencil skirt, black pumps, black cocktail dress, black pants (my personal preference is the skinny trouser) and a black coat (and by coat I am referring to a classic trench or twill peacoat not a parka). But with all this black, a lady never wants to appear drab, always add a pop of color. A yellow flat, a red lip, a technicolor scarf, or a flashy statement necklace.
Almost always in black, Posh adds a
pop  with a red  handbag

A lady's wardrobe is to be simple. She'll look clean, classic and sharp.  
"Fashion fades, only style remains the same.''
-Coco Chanel

Monday, November 28, 2011

A personal bubble conflict.

I crave physical contact. 
Not in a overtly provocative manner, though in appropriate contexts, 
spice is nice. 
Everyone has a personal bubble, but mine is conflicted.
My family isn't much for hugging. Especially as adults. 
When my older brothers left for and returned from missions, 
I gave them high fives. 
If I don't know you, I most likely will not want to touch you. 
I'm not the type to hug and air kiss my besties.
I won't snuggle up with just anyone on the couch. 
If a friend is sad, knee pats are my go to comforting touch.
But, man, if you're a boy I like, all that changes. 
It doesn't matter if we've never even spoken
 or have being dating for half the year, 
I crave your physical attention.
I take it as an affirmation of you returning my attention. 
If you touch my knee, the other one goes weak. 
If you pull me in for a quick embrace, I daydream about it the next day.
Any touch to my face and you can pretty much ask me to give you $1000 and I will. 
Now this is not to say I'm merely a mushy little girl, and I say merely because obviously I am one a bit, but I suppose because I'm so closed off otherwise, it just means so much more. 
So boys, be careful, I will be reading WAY too much into every touch. 
And if you're lucky to get a shoulder squeeze or knee pat, know that's me crushing on you, hard. 

Monday, November 21, 2011

Only in P-Town.

Only in Provo, Utah do two lovely single ladies purchase three dollar used and worn tops from decades ago to wear at a sweater themed dance party coordinated by the Bible study teachers held on a Thursday evening in a local chapel. Thanks Cate for the photographic evidence.

Oh I forgot to tell you...

Remember my car that hates me? Well it was euthanized a couple weeks ago. I got rear ended getting off the freeway by a little Mazda pick up truck on my way to work on a Wednesday. I decided I am not a fan of the following things due to this incident:

Lavender Mazdas
Balding men in their 30s living in Pleasant Grove
Being gawked at by freeway commuters
Breezy weather whilst in temple night fancy clothes
Hearing my car die
Talking to USAA
Navigating KSLs car classifieds
Not having a car
I think I left a disc in the CD player

Only two nice things have happened, the tow truck man was the sweetest and he wrapped me up in his big, most likely very dirty coat and I got a free rental car for a week that had XM radio so I jammed to Pop2K a lot (all the hits from 2000-2009, so basically the best ever). 

watch this:

Please disregard the cheesy American trailer man, it's better than that:

Oh and keep in mind that's it's French, therefore slightly risque at parts. 
It's on Netflix.

Sunday, November 13, 2011

courting behavior.

The Lady's Guide to Being a Lady
As ladies, we are to naturally appear alluring and inviting to all gentlemen. Some ladies are born with an innate ability to attract the right kind of attention while others need practice. 

How to Interact, like a Lady, with Gentlemen

First on the docket is capturing a young man's eye. As previously discussed, ladies are to dress and carry herself in a certain manner. When a lady is placed in a public gathering or venue, said lady should always look pleasing and put together. Whether alone or with a group, have a cheery disposition. Smiles and laughter naturally draw others to you. If there is a gentleman in particular that suits your fancy, my lovely lady friend Caitlin gives excellent advice about making eye contact

Second is flirtation. Once a young man has approached, flirtation begins to keep his interest. There are three tips to keep in mind: continue the cheery attitude such as laugh at his jokes, and stay interested in the conversation; subtle physical contact, i.e. a light touch to his arm; master the flirtatious smirk, which is essentially a half smile that can be interpreted as cute and inviting or sexy and mysterious, and use it often.

Third is how to behavior on a date with a gentleman. Ladies are punctual, and as such be ready for an outing on time. Ladies are, more often than not, high maintenance but the potential suitor does not need to discover that while waiting for her to primp. If the gentleman picks you up in his car, let him be a gentleman and open your door. And if does not have automatic locks, lean over and unlock his door. Courtesies like this go a long way. On a date, flirtation should continue. Keep the talk about yourself to a minimum except when posed with questions of course. A gentleman is more likely to be interested in you if you show interest in him. At the end of the night, always show gratitude. Especially thank him for anything purchased on your behalf. And this is regardless of whether you are hoping for another date. Ladies are always polite

a first for everything

Today I felt the first urge I have ever had in my life to go to Ukraine. There is actually a train that runs through this tunnel of trees in Kleven.

Saturday, November 12, 2011

the secrets of life.

I was stumbling the other night and I found this list of 50 life secrets and thought it was very interesting. I really liked the following:
 8. Smile more often.
Whenever you get a grin on your face, your brain is releasing serotonin, the happy hormone. Smiling is the natural way to force yourself to be happy. Many people even smile for five minutes straight in the morning to get themselves in a great mood for the day. It is a very powerful tool that is utilized less and less as we grow older and need happiness more than ever. Just remember that while happiness leads to smiles, smiles also lead to happiness.28Learn to lucid dream, or to realize when you are dreaming so that you can control your dreams. Sleep feels good, but it’s rather boring and unproductive. With lucid dreaming under your belt, night-time can be even more exciting than when you are awake. You can do anything: fly, travel to other planets, party with a celebrity, get intimate with your dream boy/girl, etc. Many lucid dreams have also reported being able to speak directly with the subconscious during dreams by demanding to be taken to it after becoming lucid. For those that know a thing or two about your subconscious, that is a BIG deal.
37.Be mysterious.
Don’t let off everything about you and definitely leave out some major details. There is something both alluring and mesmerizing about someone who no one knows fully about. I’m not saying to confide in no one or to alienate yourself. Just think James Bond.

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

gentlemen callers.

Don't get too excited, the title of the post is mostly just the gentlemen part. This past Saturday, after a lovely lunch with the Captain, I drove to Park City. I perused the outlets and then drove home. passing through Heber.
Heber is where I should have stopped for gas. I made a mental note to do so. As soon as I got to town, I was wrapped up in jamming to
 the hit song on the radio and forgot my mental note. I drove on through.

 Just as I made it out of town I realized the predicament I was in. 
Reminding myself that my tank empty gauge has
 a tendency to be slightly overdramatic, I kept cruising. 

I made it to the canyon,  passed the Aspen Grove turn off and I felt a chug. 
Through the tunnel and on the other side, the speedometer started slowing. With a hefty steering wheel pound and hearty exclaim of 
"Come on" I drifted to the shoulder. 

Flashers on, I called my best friends at AAA.
 I had a forty minute wait until Trevor, my savior,
 would arrive with my auto's lifeblood. 

During that time, I moved to the passenger side 
in case of a break-neck speed sideswipe.
 Luckily it was still light out and I had mobile internet to entertain me. 

After ten minutes a car pulled over 300 yards in front of me.
I watched an early 30s man walk toward me. 
Having spent the last month catching up on episodes of Criminal Minds, I
 didn't know if I should even crack a window for this potential  
Ted Bundy (he did love Utah you know).  But I got out the car with him fifty feet away and yelled AAA's a coming. He smiled, waved and promptly turned around. 

Fifteen minutes after that, another car pulled over. And yet another potential serial killer was coming straight for me. I did the same, yelled I was Ok and he left, both of us unharmed. 

Trevor came 3 minutes later and the rescuing commenced. 

Two gentlemen (three if you count Trevor, I don't because he got paid) stopped to rescue me, the damsel in distress. Don't worry ladies, there are still gems waiting to be unearthed out there. 

ten things you didn't know about me:

1. I pretend to conduct music and not always with my hands, 
watch my feet during church.
2. I prefer to sleep without a pillow. 
3. I've faked a Minnesota accent so frequently some of my words are permanently stuck that way.
4. I hate lettuce. 
5.  I wear my ctr ring upside down and backwards at all times. 
6. It is a rare occurrence for me to finish a book, I am currently half way through 3. 
7. My fingers are extremely double jointed. 
8. I took a golf class to fit in with my brothers and I currently own clubs that I've never used. 
9. I am terrified of crustaceans
10. Every time I eat, I sit on my feet. 

Sunday, November 6, 2011

lady advice.

Legendary costume designer Edith Head once said, 
Your dresses should be tight enough to show you’re a woman 
and loose enough to show you’re a lady.”

Thursday, November 3, 2011

the october challege.

Last month I challenged myself to wear heels everyday for the entire month. Not only that, but a different pair everyday. I did it to feel more feminine and mature, to wear more of my shoes and to set a goal I knew I could accomplish. And I did it. A different pair everyday. The very last day was Halloween, and I saved the best pair for last. 

 I bought the ruby slippers on a whim in London and I have finally put them to use.